I am not awesome. Yet.

I walked out of the grocery store knowing that I forgot something. I always forget something, even when I make a list. I never remember my reusable grocery bags either. I usually end up sweaty and flustered by the end of the shopping trip. Today was no exception.

As I loaded the groceries into my trunk, I looked over at the woman parked next to me. Not only did she have her groceries perfectly bagged into reusable grocery bags, she was loading all of her refrigerated and frozen foods into empty coolers she had waiting for that very purpose. She was humming peacefully, looking calm and ready to tackle a day full of productivity. 

I looked away, wiped my sweaty brow, and said to myself, “I want to be her when I grow up. #lifegoals.” 

I didn’t concern myself too much that she was probably younger than me. Also, when did I start talking to myself in hashtags?

I am not awesome. Yet.

I have my very own workbench in our pole barn. It is super cute and very functional. I used it like three times in the month after I got it before it became piled over with stuff. I want to be crafty and Pinterest-y, I really do. But, my creativity waxes and wanes.

I am not awesome. Yet.

My house is usually pretty clean and organized. But my car? Forgettaboutit. A disaster always.

I start each day with goals for how I will eat and exercise. I’d say there is a 75/25 chance I will come close to accomplishing my goals, as in 25% of the time I am remotely successful.

I am terribly uncoordinated. Just ask my friend who allowed me to drive her dinghy the other day–I don’t think she intended for me to nearly drive it into the cottage next door.

I try not to be mean to others, but sometimes I get caught up in thinking about myself first and am inadvertently hurtful.

I am not awesome. Yet. Sometimes I just plain stink (figuratively only I hope). Why do I tell you this? To help us all to fight a disease that affects so many–the pursuit of perfection. I will never be perfect, I don’t even want to be. That would be so boring and give me so much less to laugh about.

I will try to be a little bit better every day. I will try to make sure my failures and short-comings don’t interrupt my enjoyment of life or the lives of the people around me. These #lifegoals will happen…but, the empty cooler in the trunk for groceries is waaayyy out of my league.

To laugh at yourself is to love yourself. -Mickey Mouse

Special thanks to my friend Adolf Brown for teaching me and others that the pursuit of perfection is a disease. What a weight off the shoulders!

12 thoughts on “I am not awesome. Yet.”

  1. Michelle Fuller

    Today I pulled weeds that had overgrown for a month..or more. I thought about how many people drove by this location and wondered if I had noticed?? I smiled because all of the days I spent with my mom and kids up at the cottage were worth it! I was doing what matters most, making memories instead of pulling weeds.

  2. Love this!! Makes me feel a little better that last week I swiped Icy Hot under my arms instead of deodorant. Boy, that stung. Thanks for keeping it real.

  3. Quite a disease it is! It can really take over your life if you aren’t vigilant I find. Thanks for putting into words what so many of us feel…especially the comparing to others part. I have to remind myself often, we all have stories that are unknown to others. And those stories aren’t written on us so what may look like a pretty calm, put together, eco-conscious shopper may be someone who is struggling with something far worse than us. We’re all just doing the best we can, right! 😉

  4. I bet that the woman with the overly organized trunk for her groceries does not have the wonderful gif that you have for writing. Sharing your thoughts with others and admitting to what you think makes you ” not awesome yet” just makes me realize how awesome I already know you are….just with a new twist! :} You ARE awesome!

  5. I keep purchasing new reusable grocery bags hoping I’ll bring them to the store when I go. Never remember!

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